Thursday, December 27, 2012

Bad/Awesome Flixxx Review: Black Dog (1998)

"ATF - what does that stand for? "Alcohol, Tobacco and Fuck-ups?"" - Agent Ford

"I know I shouldn't drink apple juice. It gives me gas." - Wes

"One fart and you're walkin'." - Earl

My old man loves this movie. Nothing about it said that it would be awesome to me... EXCEPT for the fact that it stars Meatloaf and ... (North Carolina's own) RANDY TRAVIS!! And Patrick Swayze if you wanna get technical. TECHNICALLY he's the star, but really WHO IS the star of this movie? Is there a star? Is there anything better than explosions and big rigs? Ill let you decide as I present BLACK DOG!!!

In the beginning there is some dude running a load of guns in what looks to be Charlotte NC judging from the public transit markings on the buses that are wrecked in the ensuing chase. So feds are about to make their move on the truck when some ATF officers mess the whole thing up. They may have gotten the guns, "but they didn't get the dealer and they didn't get the buyer" is the concern of the FBI agent. This begins a battle between the two parties throughout the movie. When that load is messed up, the guy buying the load of guns needs another driver and Patrick Swayze plays a truck driver named Jack Crews.

Now Jack Crews has just gotten out of jail and lost his CDL for vehicular manslaughter. He was driving super late and trying to make it home for his little girl's baseball game or something and saw what driver's call the "black dog". He then ran off the road and killed a couple who's car was on the shoulder. Crews boss asks him to run this load for him for some extra cash. Crews declines the offer until he finds out that his house is waaay behind on payments because his wife screwed up the bills while he was in the joint. So against her wishes, he flies from new jersey to atlanta to run the shipment, whatever it is, no questions asked.

When he gets there he picks up the load of "toilets" from Red (Meatloaf) and is given a rider (Randy Travis) and 2 dudes in a Camaro to follow for protection. In about five minutes someone is already trying to hijack the load, and what blows my mind is that its Red who's trying to hijack the load. He had the load in the first place, why didn't he just keep it? Doesn't make any sense to me that he should have to go the trouble to hijack it, when he's not disguising his identity, if he got the load, they'd know who it was anyway... so I don't know. Didn't make any sense. But he keeps failing, like he tries 3 or 4 times, getting a bunch of his goons killed in the process. Then we find out someone is feeding him information, and Crews gets suspicious of the dudes he's traveling with. No one trusts anyone.

Turns out the black guy is an inside man for the feds and he gets killed. Wes, the other guy was an inside man for Red and they put him and the tracer on a different truck headed back south. The Buyer kidnaps Crews wife and daughter and Crews comes up with a plan. Wes has the feds call Crews when they catch him and Crews informs them of the real situation. When Crews goes to make the trade, the guns for his family, the feds bust them and all is well right? No, wrong, as Crews goes to drive the rig back to the impound after being rewarded with his CDL license again, Red shows up and tries to kill his family and ends up blowing his own ass sky high. Should you see this? Probably not necessary, unless you love rednecks, trucker flicks, randy travis, meatloaf, or bad flicks in general. So yes.

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